Last night I had a dream that I went to the Honeycomb Hideout.

When I was walking up to the front all of a sudden the door flew open and someone grabbed me and pulled me inside.

I looked up to see the Frito Bandito pointing his guns at me.

He said, “Don’t move, senor, or you may lose your life.”

I told him I was on the run coming to hide out here and eat delicious cold cereal.

That’s when I looked up and King Dong stepped out of the shadows.

He said, “You’ll have to excuse the Frito Bandito, young man, he is just trying to protect us.”

He went on the explain that the non-politically correct advertsing characters from the 70s and 80s were hiding out from the big bad Madision Avenue advertising executives who were trying to kill them off forever.

I looked around the room and saw more of the gang. There was non-pants wearing Mr. Kool-Aid.

And Sambo and his tiger from Sambo’s Restaurant.

And for some mysterious reason the entire cast and crew of The Love Boat.

All of a sudden I heard a rumble in the distance. Quickly the ground began to shake as we realized an army was marching toward us. Then we heard that dreaded chant:

We make holes in teeth

We make holes in teeth

The Frito Bandito yelled, “Holy Frijoles! They sent the Cavity Creeps to get us!”

King Dong turned to me, grabbed my hand, and slipped a weathered scroll into it. He said, “You must take this with you and escape!”

I said “What is it? What could they possibly want from you?”

He said, “It’s the ancient chinese secret.”

Then Calgon took me away and I woke up.

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